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Captain Paprika Teeth [userpic]


August 8th, 2008 (09:45 pm)

Half the crew had forgotton I'd even been gone! Bunch of inbreds, the lot of them. Locked inside a chest for nigh on two stinkin' years with no moving of me limbs and not so tasty rancid water. Even Jones had forgotton about me. They be sayin' things like, "Arr, captain, we thought you'd left us to go join the Spaniards", or "ARRR, captain, we thought you was sleepin' loike" or even, "ARRR!! Who the hell are y... Captain, it's you!".

I had the 'orrible chest smashed to pieces after I got out of it and it's in me fire right now, burning away. Had I thought about it, I moight've scrubbed it down first because now my entire cabin smells of burning rotten salt beef. I'm quite partial to a foine bit of rotten beef now and again, but this isn't so good.

The log says we've stopped at several ports in the last two years while I was locked away. All our money's gone, spent on rum and food. We do, however, have a lovely large stock of ships biscuits and salt beef. Pirates baint have much of an imagination when it comes to food shopping.

On one 'and, we've got a lot of cannonballs!

Mind you, we ain't got no cannons.

The boat's leaning funny.

Pirates be thick. Arr...